looking at nothing in particular
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When I retired for good about 10 years ago, the very thought of doing nothing was terrifying and intolerable, a situation to be avoided at all costs.
As a professional woman, I had been striving all my life. In the past, achieving my goals it required a Herculean effort, or slipping through a back door entrance.
But 10 years later –RetirementI found myself extolling the virtues of doing absolutely nothing, or almost doing at least a little every day. As counterintuitive as it sounds, I’ve learned that quitting has mental health benefits, even for a short time. As the long-running pandemic finally recedes, it’s tempting to return to all sorts of activities beyond our reach. But you may want to consider a few moments of doing absolutely nothing.
If that thought makes your heart stop beating, you’re not alone. Some of us either don’t want such an intensely uncomfortable experience or can’t cope and are paralyzed or incapacitated by the discomfort.
Let’s pause to define anxiety and explain some practical ways of approaching the subject, at least from the point of view of this psychologist. Addressing your anxiety will help you try the practice of doing nothing.
Simply put, anxiety is an emotion characterized by fear which has some predictable effects on our physiology. If you worry, you know that your thoughts can go down dark alleys that make your heart beat too fast. Or you may feel the tension in your body even before you realize that you are imagining a catastrophic outcome for some person or an event that is soon to take place.
When your worries precede an experience, it’s known as anticipatory anxiety. It is likely to cause some physiological effects such as dry mouth, sweating, or forgetfulness, which is actually quite common when you need to perform, such as in an exam, while giving a talk, or participating in sports. competition.
Some of us are more prone to dire thoughts, but we all worry from time to time. This is quite normal, but when nervousness or apprehension interferes with your daily life, work or relationships, it is more serious and you may need professional help. attention.
Keep in mind that adopting the practice of doing nothing can create some discomfort because it is anathema to the way of life we have embraced for so many decades: relentless jobs, big and small, and the obligations that come with being a responsible member of society. . .
Here are some tactics you can use to lessen the angst when you take on the counterintuitive task of doing nothing:
- Remember that you can stop what you’re doing (or not do, so to speak) and resume normal activity any time you want, but wait a few minutes before doing so to see if the discomfort goes away.
- Stick to your plan and intend to do nothing more than breathe slowly to calm any nervousness. Begin with a long, slow exhalation and then an inhalation as deep as is comfortable. Continue this way of breathing for at least a minute. Mindful breathing is an effective strategy that can be applied to all anxiety symptoms.
- If your comfort level hasn’t improved, connect to the here and now. Look around you at four objects that are familiar and pleasant to you. Listen for three familiar sounds, perhaps a fan or refrigerator humming, birds singing, the dishwasher running, etc. Find two objects that are soothing to the touch and cuddle them, such as a blanket, sweater, pet, or warm, wet washcloth. Nurturing any of your senses gives you a sense of calm.
Now back to doing nothing. He picks a day to start, one when urgent demands are unlikely to bother him. Pick a short block of time, like 30 minutes, and wait for some internally driven suggestions like “I think I’ll look out the window” or “I’m going to walk around my apartment or house.”
Once again, the goal is not to do it. So no ordering on the fly. Maybe go outdoors to your patio, deck, backyard, or street. But no caring for flowers or picking weeds. Just notice what you observe, feel, see or smell.
Your thoughts and emotions are valuable sources of information for you, about you, in the process of doing nothing. While this is a process similar to meditation, the goal is to embrace and appreciate each moment of the experience rather than simply breathing in the thoughts. This may be the first time in your life that you can wander around like a four-year-old with no agenda and just be curious about what you see.
The satisfying art of doing nothing is a practice that, once incorporated into your life, has proven mental and physical health benefits such as lowering blood pressure, relaxing skeletal muscles, and sharpening focus without investing in products or services and without any particular effort.